The Panther of News went on the prowl to the supermarket with the Panther Cub, (AKA Boy Three) in tow. All did not go according to plan, here’s the Panther’s own story:
Five minutes later and we are whizzing around Asda in a sugar-crazed frenzy, eyes wide and teeth quivering.
We passed the earth mother at a thousand miles an hour in our pre-diabetic coma trolley dash. “Who’s that?” says the little fella. “That’s Tarquin, he needs to wipe his arse before going on his killing spree,” I explain.
And we arrive at the checkout with an assortment of shopping that I didn’t want. The Cub is sitting astride some thawing chicken nuggets as I finally accept the invitaion to have someone else pack the bags. The cashier has seen the Cub’s eyes and my drool and wants rid of us sharpish. A quick £2 on some motorised toy and there, shopping done, no problem.
You tell it too well. I was the smug parent when my DD was 2, she had hardly any tantrums. 3 and 4 have been an entirely different matter. It turns out all I've done is taught her how to argue well. Have same inner turmoil of self preservation vs being a crap parent too.
Ah well, one day they won't want to come to Asda with us 😉
Ellen Arnison says
I think that's what Tesco.com and the rest of the .com family are for.
Older Mum says
Oh God. I've got this all to come with Little A. But the signs are already there. No to everything and she suddenly won't settle down to sleep unless I am in her room. Bye Bye evenings. Next time take a peashooter loaded with chickpeas and aim and unremorsefully fire at said little Tarquins !!!!