|Cake up (Taariq Maruzook via Flickr)|
Next month it is National Cup Cake week. Oh yes. The very event we have been waiting for. Small sponge buns with icing on them.
It’s going to be hard to control the building excitement. I know, I know. Some of the cakes might have glitter on them.
However, we can pass the time with an innovative new, erm, thing. It’s called the Little Rooster. And this genius piece of kit is a vibrator you can use to wake you up in the morning.
Really, someone has combined the function of an alarm clock and a sex toy.
We will pause for a moment while you think about that.
Yep. All night. No, idea, tape maybe. Snooze function too.
And stop. It doesn’t improve the more you consider it.
Imagine the ideas that were rejected before that one got the go ahead. Vibrating glasses so you can really celebrate finding your specs; a toilet with batteries for coming while you are going; or a stimulating cagouls for the great o-outdoors.
These two delightful things – a week for the triumph of the trumped-up children’s treat and the weirdest idea of how the female libido might work – were among the pile of press releases that arrive each day.
Ladies and gentlemen of the public relations industry I salute you, you have surpassed yourselves today.