Apparently women over 40 drink the most and the boffins are baffled. Why don’t they find a 40-something woman sober enough to answer and ask her?
Here are a selection of likely responses:
“Here I am. Over here. Yes. I know you couldn’t see me at first. That’s because I’ve become invisible. Yes. It happens when we get to a certain age and still look OK but not remarkable.”
“Hang on, I’ll talk to you in a minute. Promise. I’ve just got to meet this deadline, feed the kids, clean the house and do a few laps of the running track. Oh, what? Yes. I’ll have a minute about 11pm, but you’d better be quick because I tend to nod off.”
“Yesh, of coursh, I’m drunk. You want shome?”
“One for me, one for the trifle, one for me, one for the coq au van, one for me one for the fondue… bugger Nigella.”