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| Mince: full of beefy potential |
Ooft. The smell of mince hit us as soon as we found our way to the ‘family’ dining room. Every adult in the place bore the look of someone who had just been momentarily transported to their school lunchtimes only to realise it was just a trick of the mind.
Perhaps it was that shared relief that led us all to stay where we were, with the minciness all around us. Who knows? But stay we did.
We had booked the family dinner at the Fisher’s Hotel, Pitlochry, specifically laid on for families leaving – just outside the front door – for the Enchanted Forest.. The website – no food details given – offered two courses for just short of a tenner and kids under 12 half price.
We didn’t bother with a starter, particularly because startering kids could pick from just soup or melon. The kitschy retro vibe of this went over their heads.
Mains for adults were mince and tatties, sausage and mash, haggis or macaroni cheese. Mains for kids were sausage and mash, macaroni cheese, mince and tatties or ham salad with fries.
As it happened we had sausage and mash for lunch and so no one much fancied that.
There was nothing to get one’s teeth into just lots of versions of mush. Plus I know of no children who would choose a ham salad for supper, even when enhanced by chips.
Equally I know of few adults who order unadulterated mince – lasagna, Shepherd’s pie, chili, spag bol, burgers or meatballs certainly, but dull, boring naked mince, no.
We consdiered going elsewhere, but time was pressing and Boy One – prone to anxiety – wouldn’t cope, so we ordered.
The food arrived suspiciously quickly – garnished only by skin on the sauces and a scatter of chives. Then pudding – think school dinners without the redemption of custard, didn’t really improve matters.
As well as a bad taste I was left wondering:
- When this is the Fisher’s Hotel – also evidenced by angling-themed decorations – why was there no fish on the menu?
- Elsewhere in the hotel – restaurant and bar – they promise crispy, fresh and green things, why not here?
- Children might like simpler fare, but there’s no reason to think their parents do.
- Even if a menu is designed for speed and profit, there’s no reason to miss taste out of the equation. Or make it quite so obvious.
We didn’t let our beugh supper at the Fisher’s Hotel in Pitlochry spoil our wonderful trip to visit the Enchanted Forest. However, I would urge anyone else to go elsewhere or take sandwiches.