It’s a terrible cringe of a word – period. If a word ever wore a tight bun and kept its books in alphabetical order, it’s a period.
This is the word that goes with the twee trickles of dyed blue water poured in gleaming ad-land laboratories. Period. Flow, stop. Period.
We need something better. Humanity has known this for as long as there have been women recognising that weighted, dragging feeling. Perhaps we should be pleased that manky menstruators are no longer banished to the shed for the duration, but, really, this selection isn’t good enough. They range from meh to yukky and back again:
- The curse
- Bad week
- Time of the month
- Women’s trouble
- Leaky week
- Painters in
- Auntie Flo
- On the rag
- Jam week
- Cousin Red
- Crimson wave
- Get one’s red wings
- On the blob
- In her flowers
- Ride the cotton pony
- Sally
- Shark week
- feeling delicate
- Flowing
- Flying the Japanese flag
- Lining the drawers
- On a ketchup diet
- Struck down with girl flu
- Joining hte cast of pad men
- Little red riding hood is making her way through the woods
- Aunt ruby is visiting
- Checking in to the red roof in.
- The kitty is sick
- Losing my lining
- Red wedding
- Strawberry week
- Lady time
- The red panda
The only thing that made me smile as I was researching this was the discovery that George Michael is rhyming slang for menstrual cycle.
