Panther is muttering into his beer, an odd look on his face. “What?”“That woman over there…”“Yes.” He’s looking at half of an unremarkable couple tucking into paella on the other side of the restaurant. She seems to me like she’d probably choose to read Woman’s Own at the hairdresser.“I’ve seen her bits,” he confesses. “All […]

VW campervans were once the preserve of antipodeans and surfers, or perhaps both. You could sort of see the attraction: the iconic shape, the open road, the let’s-start-the-party-right-here lifestyle.But then being stuck behind one on the road as it grumbles and farts its way along a busy lochside can kill the romance fairly quickly. At […]

The other day I caught the Panther dithering at the bottom of the stairs a look of anguish on his face. “What’s up?”“Oooh, it’s something I vowed I’d never do.”“What is?”“Yelling up the stairs at the kids: ‘turn that music down, it’s too loud!’.”Sure Boy One’s appreciation of McFly was a bit enthusiastic. But it […]

I’m pleased for Kenny Richey. No, really. I hope he’s enjoying sitting at his mother’s table again, deciding to go for a walk if he wants, watching the telly, basically suiting himself. 20 years on death row is too long for anyone, especially someone who didn’t deliberately commit murder. It’s the square end of the […]

Tis the season of goodwill to all men and don’t-mind-if-we-bring-the-deadline-forward-do-you to all freelancers. Consequently, it’ll be a bit quiet on the blog for a week or so.I just can’t be expected to think up funny things to write while filing copy early, making shepherd costumes, keeping the house clean and forgetting what I’ve ordered for […]